— 2025 —

Alexander's
Dating Wrapped

A year of extensive field research
with inconclusive results.

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01 — 11
The Researcher
Your Photo Here

"The Man Behind the Data"

Investor · Dancer · Frequent Flyer · Still Single

02 — 11
First Dates Logged
5

Prospects Evaluated

Quality over quantity. Mostly.

03 — 11
Market Segmentation

The Archetypes

20%

The Grounded One

Loved everything about me except my passport.

20%

The European Chapter

Plot twist in Spain. Great story, open ending.

20%

The Question Mark

She kept asking herself if she liked me. Answer: no.

20%

The Aesthetic

10/10 presentation. We read different books.

20%

The Dance Floor

Electric rhythm. Zero logic.

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Sourcing Strategy

How We Met

Dating Apps
0%
Referrals
20%
In The Wild
80%

"I don't swipe. I approach."

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Top Date Venues

Where We Went

🏰 European Fortress Málaga, Spain
🎸 House Concert Intimate venue
🍽️ Gourmet Restaurant Fine dining
🪩 Dance Floor Where words are optional
06 — 11
Conversion Rates

The Funnel

5 First Dates
2 Made It Past Date 2
0 Became Serious

"Highly selective. Perpetually available."

07 — 11
Community Guidelines

Status: Gentleman

0
Blocked
0
Muted
0
Unhinged Texts

"Clean record. Dignity intact."

08 — 11
Girlfriends Acquired
0

The position remains unfilled
due to rigorous hiring standards.

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2026 Candidate Profile

What I'm Looking For

Tall & Fit — can keep up on a dance floor and a hiking trail

Travel-Ready — owns a passport and actually uses it

Quick Wit — fluent in sarcasm

Intellectually Curious — actually reads

Looks Devastating — in a black dress

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2026 Outlook

I'm Your Last First Date

You dated 6. I dated 5.
That's 11 interviews and zero offers accepted.
I'm not applying for the job. I'm acquiring the company.

One date. Just us.
I'll bring the passport. You bring the wit.

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